I wrote about my experience with depression the other day and it felt good.
Now it seems the bugger wants to creep back in.
Yea. People. It does that. And its funny, I didn’t think I’d get the courage to write about it here.
You see, I am sort of an introvert. I don’t like sharing my problems. I have too few friends. I mostly only talk to my mum. She’s my one true friend.
Hmm… I’ve found myself wondering what it all means. Many people tell me I am a true friend. I wonder who I can say is a true friend to me. Maybe I’ve placed higher standards on my friends. I don’t know. But of late I find myself questioning the motives of the people around me. I find myself wondering who is true and who isn’t.
I don’t like asking for help. I don’t know why but I just don’t. I end up suffering alone. Be it a work related issue or maybe even a money issue. I would rather starve than beg people for loans. Maybe it is a pride thing. I don’t know.
My therapist isn’t around. She’s gotten busy lately. I need a replacement. I really need one. Especially now. Things aren’t too great.
Elani has a new song out:
Usinilenge, ju siku moja nitakulenga pia
Usinicheke, juu siku moja nitakucheka pia
Bobea boea, bobea bobea, Ngojea
Lets just say I am doing all I can to ensure I don’t sink back in. But the truth is, depression is creeping back in.
P.S. I am fundraising for a much needed surgery to be done in Dec/Jan. Click here for more deets.